Movie Review: New Moon

"OMFG! I die! I die!"

That might as well have been what the girls were thinking every time they squealed over a pair of pretty pecs (and there are many) in New Moon.

So what the heck was Miss Tea doing in a movie theater with a bunch of teenage twits? Darling, please. If someone placed in front of you a chocolate ice cream sundae, swathed in hot fudge and sprinkled with walnuts, with a ripe cherry on top, wouldn't you have stopped yourself to take a look? Don't lie.

For many of the young viewers (and Miss Tea), the "hunk" factor seemed to be the memorable highlight of New Moon. But was it better than Twilight? Eh.

In fact, Miss Tea thought everything (film, story, "teen angst" acting) was on the exact same level as Twilight. Where the first film focused on Edward, New Moon focuses on the awkwardly flirtatious Jacob, thus putting Bella in quite the pickle (lucky hussy). New Moon moves at a decent pace (better than Twilight) and has impressive animation, although the werewolves look more like oversized Shiba Inu puppies than ferocious predators (what? they look soooo cute! I want one!).

Overall, Miss Tea enjoyed the flick and as she said before, it's the fluff needed to get to the good stuff...which would be Eclipse and Breaking Dawn (read the books - don't worry, it's at a 3rd grade reading level, you'll finish all four in a week).

There is one scene that will throw almost all viewers off and if you've seen the film, you know exactly which scene Miss Tea is talking about: the Hansel and Gretel scene. WTF is that? Did the producers run out of $$$? For such a dark moment in the film, why does the director think we need to cut to a frolic in the woods, skipping along as if we are off to grandmother's house? Ugh.

Another New Moon peeve of Miss Tea's is the main character Bella, annoyingly portrayed by Kristin Stewart. Not that Miss Tea expects any of these three to hit the Oscars for their acting chops, but ... is Kristin even acting? After watching a few interviews of Kristin au natural, it doesn't seem like it. Miss Tea would like to smack the stutter out of her. Hopefully Bella will be different when she turns into a vampire.


This picture sums up the visual for New Moon. It's almost like 300, but for teens.

Some people may be disappointed that Edward is hardly in this film. But if you give a fair chance, you might not mind.





Hence, the debate tearing fans apart: Team Edward or Team Jacob. What team is Miss Tea on? She'll never tell. ;o)

PS: For those of you who are clueless on the Twilight Saga, visit: http://www.twilightthemovie.com/